Sunday, February 10, 2002

Great news, everyone! "Ocean's Eleven", the newest Soderbergh filmic treat to fill your life with ill-defined joy, does the Valentine's Day preview thing this Thursday, neatly dovetailing with my day off and a showing at York's glorious City Screen cinema. Dare I hope for THX screen 1? Oh, I sneakily suspect so....

It's almost as though the nice people at Warner Brothers are doing all this just for my delight, perhaps because they spookily predicted that I needed a movie pick-me-up after an unrelentingly crapulent, eminently loathsome week at work. The highlight of said week? The widely-expressed belief amongst friends and colleagues that I look a hell of a lot like "Pop Idol" winner, Will Young, which is not what you want to hear at the end of a lengthy, energy-sapping night shift: Never has the phrase "Bite My Shiny, Metal Ass" been banded about with such regularity by one person.

Naturally, I intend to move heaven and earth so that you can read a review here on Friday afternoon (Probably some time after 13:00pm, GMT, but potentially nearer 14:00pm, if you really want to be accurate..) and run my whimsical nonsense against Mark Kermode's equally enthusiastic opinion on Simon Mayo's agreeable show on BBC Radio Five Live (Which I, ever the contrarian, listen to on Sky Digital channel 855). It's a whole crazy, critical synergy thing that I do for you, my reading audience, out there in the wide world, because I love you all. Honest.

Stuff which amazed me this week? You need to try and check out the HMV sale - I give them so much space in print that I should be on commission, don't you think? - where I picked-up the recently reissued and reconfigured DVD releases of the "Scream" trilogy for £40.00 in their "Two for £20.00" deal, alongside the Director's Cut of "Stargate"(DTS sound, punks! How do you like those apples?!), which is a mucho good thing, wouldn't you agree? I need another job just to afford some of the special offers which I see around town of late - Has there ever been a better time to be a humble DVD consumer? I think not, super-friends.

Next week's discular highlights? You'll be wanting to pick up "Jurassic Park 3" on it's retail launch, with a ton of special features to enjoy and that really welcome choice between DD 5.1 and DTS 5.1 audio, though I would try to buy it via one of those convenient internet sites, if I were you. You don't want to fall over dead in a high street store trying to charge you £19.99 for this flick - I think that some supermarkets might help y'all out if you're looking for a decent price, too.

The Sigourney Weaver/Jennifer Love Hewitt comedy, "Heartbreakers", is out too and well worth a look, even if you don't share my hopeless crush on the lovely JLH - There are vulgar laughs aplenty in this con-artist comedy and even a few smart ones too, if you can get past some slightly dicey Rom-Com plotting, John Debney's score, which is fine but very similar to Thomas Newman's "American Beauty" efforts, Sigourney's amazing Russian accent and Gene Hackman's truly gross-out turn as the world's most disgusting tobacco baron. It's all directed by David Mirkin, who is a "Simpsons" graduate, and he certainly makes the most of the Miami locations, the acting talent on display and Jennifer's almost absurdly sexy costume choices (My eyes popped-out on stalks, I swear, at two points in the movie. You'll guess which ones when you see it...).

That's it for now, ladies and gentlefolks - I have urgent business to attend to with a truculent VCR and I suspect that physical violence may be my last and only resort. Pray for me, and it.


Patster Hiroprotovitch

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