Saturday, June 08, 2002

Hold onto your hats, fellow believers, it's time for the feature that all the smart kids are calling "Lord Hiroprotovitch shouts out to his posse!"

Or, to put it another way, some more objectionable, self-referential indulgent tripe to waste that bit more bandwidth than this Blog already does.

To Paul, not so far away from where I'm typing this, I will promise to try and get myself a nifty comments facility on this site as soon as I possibly can. The problem, I guess, is that they only accept so many folks a day and I'm never online when they accept applications from 'Net-unfriendly buffoons like me. Working on it, though. Because, if nothing else, I really need to hear praise, encouragement and proposals of imminent harm from my reading public.

Like, I have a reading public? How did that happen?

To Katrina, rather further away from where I'm typing this, I do hope that the experience of seeing Kevin Costner's latest film,"Dragonfly", doesn't send you over the edge, up the other side and into some parallel reality where you find yourself saying stuff like "Actually, 'Waterworld' has some good stuff in it". Even Joss couldn't save that flick. Surely your Mum would rather see Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst performing web ballet about the skies of Manhattan in "Spider-Man"? If you do see Spidey, just be sure that you make your run for the exit before that Chad Kroeger song fires up over the end credits (I've suddenly developed a profound dislike of Nickleback and their lead singer in the last few days - Must be something to do with last month's feature in "Spin" magazine).

Also, heartfelt and profuse thanks for the "Once More With Feeling" tape - I'm presently performing a staggeringly bad version of "I'll Never Tell" to selected unfortunates in my inner circle. Let's just say that Ewan McGregor isn't losing any sleep over my threatening to steal his crown as the king of the latter-day musical.

Cryptic messages over, I do have to ask the question that's running and running in my neck of the woods - Seriously, has anybody out there heard the Box Car Racer album, yet? It's that Blink 182 side project, or the imminent New Found Glory record jostling for position in the battle to win my "Not exactly punk, but kind of fun" dollars...

Sunday, June 02, 2002

"Why, Sega and Yu Suzuki, with your next gen, spit-and-polish update job on classic 80s arcade time-waster, 'Out Run', you truly are spoiling us..."

But this one is pretty cool, too - with swiftly-typed thanks to Sheffield's foremost Scooby Gangsterette, the near-legendary wandering star, Katrina, for the heads-up....

I'm a casual geek? I can think of several hundred people who would disagree with that assessment...

Live from Norwich - It's the link of the week!
You're one cool cookie. You love movies, especially obscure ones, and you talk about them all the time. Even if people don't understand what you are talking about, they stick around anyway because you're just so much fun to be around. You don't always stand out in a crowd, but you can often be identified by your cluster of groupies and fans. You're usually the one throwing all the good parties, too.

Which Pixies song are you?

Hey there, superfriends.

Like so many young men before me, and like many who will tread the path of least resistance in years to come, I have been cowed by possibility and hitched my colours to the Microsoft juggernaut.

Or, to put it another, slightly clearer way, I've only gone and bought a second-hand, low-mileage, one careful owner XBox, with which to play games, watch DVDs upon and generally waste even more time with.

And, being the absolute Casual Gaming Scum that I am, I bought the inevitable copy of "Halo" to play on it. A game which is, without a hint of a glimmer of a shadow of a doubt, more fun than should be legal. Sadly, though, I suck tremendously at it, lacking as I do even the basic skills to be a successful player of the First Person Shooter genre. I'm the kind of "Halo" neophyte who rushes the first beach after deployment, strafes enemy and fellow trooper alike with a barrage of plasma grenades and rifle fire and somehow manages to blunder through the fray just long enough to reach the initial marker and prompt the dropship to drop the Warthog jeep.

After that? Let's just say that, in my undisciplined hands, the heroic central character Master Chief reveals that his driving skills rival Maureen from "Driving School", dooming his gunnery crew to certain death at the claws of the endless alien horde who populate the planet of Halo. So far, I'm still looking for the map room on the first level, engaging the enemy in clumsy gun battles and generally having a Blue Whale of a time with Bungie's way-cool shooter.

Other good XBox things? I'm quite into the MP3 facility on Bill's wonder machine, and spent Sunday morning ripping, burning and patiently transferring albums to the hard drive, whilst also removing the previous owner's truly shocking preference for Euro Cheese dance bilge from my precious memory - People who favour Alice Deejay and Ian Van Dahl are not to be trusted with such fine gaming hardware. There are now fine albums by The Promise Ring, 'A' and Jimmy Eat World gracing the Soundtrack facility on my XBox and not as much as a hint of anything which could be played in good conscience by Dave 'Trance Trousers' Pearce.

I so need to buy "Jet Set Radio Future" and "Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3" that it isn't even funny....

Which is, of course, as it should be.

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